Networking...It's Elementary
Networking...It's Elementary
The word “networking”, while creating an orgasmic flurry of excitement in some, can often cause an otherwise mature adult to roll their eyes like a teenage girl. Why such extreme reactions? The one panting thinks he will meet someone at the next meeting that will make him a millionaire and the other sees it as a waste of time because the guy living from event to event is doing so over a garage.
Networking alone does not put food on the table nor does being a hermit help grow your business. If you are fortunate enough to have a team where the introverted workaholic is balanced by the gifted socialite, then your chances for success are good. But what if YOU are the team?
Regardless of the scenario, everyone can find their balance if they stay networking neutral. How do you do that? Well, first of all, stop looking at it as “networking” and start looking at it as making friends. Now, what did we learn about making friends in elementary school…. Be nice, don’t interrupt and share your toys. Things really aren’t that different – our clothes are just bigger.
Nobody liked the pushy bully in school and now he’s grown up to be a salesman – no matter what he’s selling, people will go hide in the corner to escape his mouth. Selling should not be your goal. Building a relationship should be. You can’t expect a deal to close on the first night…. people who do that are called sluts, if you recall. So, be patient, be charming, and be liked.
Nobody really liked the snotty “soch” that wouldn’t share her Aqua Net and talked about, well, about herself. So focus on asking questions and give your elevator pitch in a conversational way and when solicited. Don’t worry, people will ask what you “do” because it’s more comfortable than asking who you “are” on a first date.
The shy girl always on the sideline at the high school dance probably grew up and created something amazing like the windshield wiper. But, at a networking event, she’s probably still waiting for someone to smile her way. Be the one who does it! Bring someone out of their shell and they’ll never forget you. If you were the star quarterback, probably by now your waistline is higher than the number on your jersey but all of that attention probably gave you quite a bit of confidence. Use your powers for good – help someone feel part of the action. Be helpful to someone else and you will be remembered.
Of course, if we only knew back then that the “nerd” would grow up to run a Fortune 500, we might have said yes when he asked us out. So, when someone who doesn’t seem like your “type” wants to chat or grab coffee, take the half hour to do so. You’ll still have friends the next day at the lunch table, trust me.
In a way, all this “networking” stuff is really very old school. In all of this “over sharing” and electronic communication we’ve seemed to have forgotten the art of conversation…. but that’s for another blog.